Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Movie Review: The Terminators

The Terminators
The Asylum, USA, 2009.
The Terminators title
A space station is overrun by hacked TR-cyborgs (Terminators). Another shipment of TR4-units (muscular Paul Logan) are coming to Earth. A task force tries to enter the space station to close the control computer TR5 but then they spend the rest of the film probably sitting in the space station closet. One of the space commandos is named Hicks by the way.
Paul Logan
TR4
From the futuristic space war we proceed to the problems of regular people who are unaware of the threat. Chuck (Clint Browning) and Tiffany (Lucinda Rogers) want to get married but Chuck is still married to Chloe (Lauren Walsh). Charlie's (The Asylum regular Dean Kreyling) daughter Lucy is going to visit L.A. and he asks museum recommendations from Sheriff Reed (A Martinez). Suddenly they find themselves under attack and L.A. explodes not very spectacularly. TR4 destroys Charlie's car with a pole. Poor Charlie. Then TR4s start killing everyone they see. 
Dean Kreyling and A Martinez
Charlie and Sheriff Reed
The Terminators
There goes Charlie.
The Sheriff and a group of survivors hide in an old factory. There is cigar-chomping Sam (Gary Miller-Youst), gun collector Pallas (Sara Tomko), nervous Bronson (Dustin Harnish), black girl Laura (Krystle Connor) and mother (Dana Tomasko?) who dies first. After the escape the survivors meet Kurt (Jeremy London) who knows how to stop the cyborgs. The plan involves stealing a spaceship and flying to space station to flip the on/off switch (really). 
Gary Miller-Youst
Sam
Krystle Connor
Laura (left)
Sara Tomko
Pallas
Blatantly ripping off the Terminator-franchise, and adding some space combat a la "Battlestar Galactica" it is still surprisingly fun. It is not a good dilm in traditional sense but compared to usual Asylum products it is on the better side and the pace of the movie is right. Paul Logan looks as credible as Terminators and the effects seem to be used more creatively than in usual Asylums.
Paul Logan
It even has a "Blade Runner" moment when one of the characters is revealed to be a cyborg. Then the character begins to talk like a robot. Then there are also plenty of random scenes, funny dialogue and non-purposeful explosions. For the fans of campy 80s and 90s cyborg films it should be moderately fun.
Lauren Walsh
Chloe
Lucinda Rogers
Tiffany
Dustin Harnish
Bronson
Jeremy London
Kurt

The cover picture lies. There is only one of those exoskeleton cyborgs.

Rating: Good (as a cheap cyborg-film) /Bad (as a regular film)

Starring: Jeremy London, A Martinez, Paul Logan, Lauren Walsh, Sara Tomko, Dustin Harnish, Clint Browning, Lucinda Rogers, Mark Hengst, Gary Miller-Youst, Joel Hebner, Naómi Hurter, Russell Reynolds, Stephen Blackehart, Jason S. Gray, Dean Kreyling, Krystle Connor, Michael C. Parisi, Jason Yorrick, Justin Spanko, Geoff Stirling Jr., Dana Tomasko, Monique La Barr, Jay Plemons, Jay Beyers, Cole S. McKay, Elvis Naumovski, Edmond Choi, Conor Gomez, Debra Harrison-Lowe, Sex Henderson
Director: Xavier S. Puslowski

5 comments:

  1. Olinkin jo tyystin unohtanut tämän (häpeä, minä). Tuo kansikuva sai minut aikoinaan hykertelemään ilosta, vaikka toki tiesin sen tuttuun tapaan bullshittaavan ja silti se pääsi unohtumaan. Varmaan jokin toinen laatuelokuva, kuten jokin niistä kymmenistä haielokuvista tuli tielle.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ehkäpä se oli Mecha Shark. Kieltämättä näihin kansikuvia piirtävällä täytyy olla varsin hyvä mielikuvitus.

      Delete
  2. Minulta löytyy semmottis kombinaatiohärdelli, josta löytyy tämä ja Universal Soldiers. UniSolsista mieleen jäi semmoinen hauskuus, että mainitut soltut käyttävät siinä viimeisintä huipputeknologiaa olevaa aseistusta, eri heitettäviä seipäitä.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ha! Veikkaan että myös näytteleminen siinä on melkoisen seipäänniellyttä.

      Delete
    2. No se on sanomattakin selvää se.

      Delete

Thank you for your interest! (All comments are moderated before publishing so please be patient!)

Recommendations by Engageya